Monthly Archives: October 2010

Chance of a Lifetime

You say that I’m lucky for all that I’ve got
Be careful, my friend, who desires my lot
If you covet my prize then consider the cost
Observe both what I’ve won as well that which I’ve lost
Jealousy on the success earned by others
Stifles potential, empowerment smothers
So high and so mighty you sit there and judge
Come down from the sidelines,bring with you your grudge
What makes me so special, so different from you?
The fact that I try not, the fact that I do
The answer is simple, not some magic potion
Just get off your butt and move forward in motion
Tired of hearing a wimpy “I couldn’t”
If you believe that deserve it you shouldn’t
At least then please spare me your whiney sob story
We all have our problems, no courage no glory
I am not smarter or faster or better
The difference between us is I’m a go getter
If Only or I Wish or Maybe Someday
Cheap words for somebody not willing to pay
Step up, call my bluff, lay your cards on the table
Let go of your safety net, trust me, your able
A circumstance victim, you pitifully pout
How long will it take for that card to play out?
I don’t understand or know what you’ve been through?
You dwell in the past? Your sole limitors’ you
I’m not being cold or unkind or unfair
I’m tipping you off, You’ll succeed if you dare
Squander your time on designing your reasons
Energy wasted, an excuse for all seasons
You think that I’ve cornered the market on luck?
A hole of self pity you’ll always be stuck
What pain doesn’t kill you will just make you stronger
Determined dig deeper enduring much longer
Quit your complaining and jump in the game
Spectator never earns fortune and fame
What can you win if you don’t risk the play?
Haven’t you heard empty wagers don’t pay?
A coward will sit there and blabber the talk
The brave will endeavor to master the walk
Equation to puzzle the quizzical mind:
Do just what you’ve done and what change will you find?
Paradigm shifting, face challenge to grow
Pressuring boundaries so limits let go
Designing your dreams will project them to happen
Transform your life putting action to yappin’
Envy is one of the deadliest sins
Crippling you from achieving your wins
Every moments a choice, every choice is a chance
Every movement you make is a chance to advance
Our future is painted by what we can see
Believe in your self and your vision will be
If you imagine it, it can be yours
Opportunity’s banging! Just open your door!

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End of Asia to Home to Liftoff once again…

It’s been a long time since I have written. For you, that is. I guess I have been doing some writing on and off in my own private books but to you, I am still in Asia. I guess after my birthday things just picked up and I stopped making time to share. I guess it was also the fact that I was winding down from that trip and I knew it. So I will attempt to give an overview of what has happened between then and now. I warn you, it will be in no way complete or even in order. I am just in a free flow place and will go with that. I may go back into these pockets and elaborate later on what may be brief points. The idea of going back almost a year has been overwhelming and has kept me from starting several times. A lot has happened. Hence my trepidation to catch you all up. Oh well, I gotta start somewhere. Here goes nothing.

So after Laos which I ended having a memorable day on the elephants with my soul sister Julienne, I took the slow boat down back to Thailand. In line to get on the boat, I met a lovely young lady from California who was about to join the peace corps. I ended up getting sick on the boat after a toxic meal at the overnight stop. I am talking like deadly sick and I spent half the time laying on the floor of the boat trying to keep myself together. My new friend Shannon was kind and did her best to take care of me but truly, there was nothing to be done. I just had to let it pass. To anyone who wants to enjoy the wonderful boat ride (I recommend going Northbound rather than the more crowded Southbound trip), don’t eat at the Indian restaurant in Pakbeng, no matter WHAT he offers you.

We ended up traveling together for the next few weeks. We went to Chang Rai and then spent some time in a hill tribe village. It was a stunning environment and the experience was one I would highly recommend. Next we made our way down to Chang Mai where I parted ways with Shannon and decided to chill out before heading back to Bangkok. I had originally planned just to take it easy and get massages everyday but then in the hair salon, everything changed. A very bling bling egotistical soccer player from Africa convinced me I should jump on the bus with him the next morning and go to Pai. I had heard great things about Pai but didn’t think I was going to make it there this trip. I guess fate had something else in mind.

Though I gave him a ton of objections, this charismatic but pushy dude dissolved them all and next thing I knew I was on the way to the darling little hippy town in Northern Thailand. I am so glad I went because this turned out to be one of my favorite stops. Almost as soon as we got off the bus, I realized that the way we traveled differed too much to stick together so I bid my friend adieu. I spent a night in the town before discovering a Piranha Fishing Pond where I proceeded to spend the last of my days in Asia. I absolutely loved it there. I fished and played with the two baby kittens who just “happened” to wander onto the property a couple days before. I was in heaven, seriously. I went into town a couple times to enjoy the nutritious and delicious fare. The night market was charming and there were enticing deals galore of local crafts, foods, and spa treatments. I could have stayed here forever.

Alas, all good things must come to an end. I was able to tear myself away from Pai and get myself back to Chang Mai where I jumped on the night train to Bangkok. I enjoyed the night train immensely but admit that I wasn’t really looking forward to the hustle and bustle that is Bangkok after finding such peace in the North.

My last 24 hours in Asia were a whirlwind of craziness. I heard that song One Night in Bangkok whirring through my brain all the while. I hired a cab for the day and shopped my heart out, went to the Floating Markets, and sampled all my favorite foods that I had discovered over the past few months. I ended up on Koh San Road (backpackers mecca) getting last minute beauty treatments, nibbling 50 cent Pad Thai, sipping fresh fruit smoothies and buying yet more souvenirs. If there was any chance of empty space in my luggage (which I had bought specifically for the last week of purchases which I crammed full of goodies to give to my peeps at home), it was squashed in that last few hours in Bangkok. My feet were so sore from all the craziness so collapsed into one of the chairs and paid a man for a 30 min foot massage while waiting for my cab to fetch me. It was the wee hours of the morning when I boarded my plane and I felt completely spent. I sighed loudly in relief. I felt a strong sense of accomplishment but I was ready to go. Even though it was mid winter and I would be entering into the deep freeze, I just wanted my home.

I spent the rest of February reacclimatizing to being back in North America…I guess that continued well into March and April too. In that time I really didn’t do a lot except my taxes and meditate every day. I made it a real priority to sit in silence for up to an hour a day. I though that with that much meditation I would surely become enlightened or something. I didn’t. I didn’t really notice a lot changing in me but now, looking back, I realize that sitting quietly for long periods of time by my window was pretty much all I could do at this point. Points for me on becoming more proactive in my reentry to Western culture. It’s getting easier for me to adjust after trips as long as I give myself that buffer zone.

In April, I started going to the gym and reconnecting with my friends again. I started dating a bit but that was a bit of a gong show. I suppose its par for the course but seriously, some of these guys were certified wackadoodles. I spent a lot of my days at the coffee shop across the street and found that I fit in well with the regulars. We had many a interesting debate about this that and the other. Infact, it was my Sugarbowl gang who gave me the last little push to jump on the iPhone bandwagon. I have to admit after resisting this “fad” for years, I now know I will never go back. I love (and I mean LOVE) my new toy and spent a good part of the spring playing with it and the wonderful world of apps.

The closer summer got, the happier I felt. I was feeling really sad that some of my favorite friends were moving away though. I maintained my health and commitment to remaining clear through the summer months despite a few temptations. I went to and worked at Astral Harvest, a music festival up in Northern Alberta in July. It was oodles of fun and I was really proud of myself for finally conquering that old demon. Since I was able to enjoy that, I gave myself the go ahead to attend Burning Man again.

After rehabilitating myself after the string of unfortunate incidents which broke me in the summer of 2007, I finally felt ready to go back to the scene of the crime, so to speak. I decided for sure that I would pack up my lil’ Trillium trailer and roadtrip around the States after attending Burning Man. I spent the rest of the summer keeping busy as a bee. I beautified my home a bit and surprised myself at how handy I was by re-doing my balcony/deck into something of an oasis. I went camping with my mom alot, reunited with my sister after having been estranged for the last year (man did I miss her!), and even unexpectedly got a job managing a hip new coffee shop on Whyte Ave. I got to spend time with my niece and nephews going to movies and Cirque de Soleil. I also spent time picking berries and apples at my parents.

Right before it was time to leave for the States on my road trip to Burning Man and Beyond, I went on a train trip with my Mom from Edmonton to Vancouver. I got to visit with my extended family before buying my cousins car and driving back to Edmonton. The last week in Alberta was crazy with all sorts of prep for the trip and I almost lost my head. I really packed my days and nights with stuff I had to do (not to mention a last minute trip to Calgary for a Bon Voyage Burners party) and get done. But in the end, it all worked out. I got my Trillium hitched up to my trailer and on August 26, I was off.

Grateful for memory.

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